I don’t know what it was about that day
you came by
I guess it seems every day
you chose to stop by
for whatever reason
there was this band of elastic warmth
like chemistry though subtle
yet very much felt
between us
mmmm — grabbing

I don’t know what it was about them days
we had nice conversations
didn’t always agree
but didn’t argue either
I saw you smile
I even saw you gravitate towards me
from the couch at the other end
I was at the desk looking at the computer screen
we were talking about not a single thing
just a moment of silence
before your body lifted you
moving you directly to me
you came and touched my hair
in a way that didn’t feel
like the sun against my skin
on just any ol’ day

so how did it feel…
you touching my hair?
mmmmmmm…
like a rainy day
laying on the couch by the window sill
resting at the sound
of the pound of rain falling
gently in the most relaxing
and soothing way
like massaging
yea it felt just that good
one that demanded my attention
one that said
deny me not.

Well –
I gotchu.
Mmmm
Yea.
I do.

There was a pause
of which I felt immediately
you stopped
as if you hadn’t a clue what you were doing
I knew that you had caught yourself
that’s why the sudden stop
softly abrupt
in the moment

I smiled
still hadn’t turned around, though
and let it go
instead of pursuing the continuation
of your thought
which I’m sure
it was uncertainty
that had you second guessing if you were ready

you seemed to be drawn to me
like you just had to touch
in some way
be close
and feel some part of me
while being around me
I don’t let people touch my hair
and definitely not in a stroking manner
running down towards the base of my neck
oh I wasn’t going to stop you
I was open and ready to receive you
if only you knew
I was actually a bit fond of you
maybe I still am
but you stopped yourself
dead in your tracks
as if you felt you shouldn’t be doing that
yes I could feel the energy change
my body and mind attuned to your presence
like frequency
tuning into the smooth jazz love songs
on the radio stations
staying completely focused
and highly tuned on you
All this and I hadn’t yet
turned to affix my eyes
upon you and your sexy beauty
I couldn’t just yet
Because to face you
would be to act
I could feel you
And was enjoying
how you gradually came
taking your time
to advance me.

I had my doubts about it
just in thought days before
‘She’s straight’
I’ll just see what unfolds
being open to whatever goes
(or of course, whatever doesn’t — hehe)
via this friendship
we have established.

Y’see I have been looking at you lately
however just keeping it at friends level
but interested nonetheless
we may both be females
but I won’t bite
unless you want me to.

When you did leave that day
you found that as a good enough reason
without seeming too obvious
as far as you thought
to embrace me
even if I weren’t facing your direction

I could literally feel
that day your upper body on me
it was strange
as I hadn’t before
in an embrace
I could feel their location
right on my shoulder bones
as if needing to get my attention
in a way that could not be dismissed
because in an embrace before
I hadn’t felt your soft breasts
and the tips of your nipples like that
NOT LIKE THAT
like it had finally made some form of contact
it had been longing for
my body’s awareness said ‘HELLO’
wow it was strange

but it too
I ignored
at least raising no awareness to you
thinking and wondering
but I turned to hug you in return
partially but not in full
my arms wrapped around your thick body
I think you may have wanted
but you saw people around
people you apparently cared what they thought

I’ve grown attentive to your vibes
that I responded to them all
in a way that could satisfy you a little
just enough to keep you content
when others were around when you’d show up
After all what was the rush
to lay an intimate kiss upon your lovely lips
while you’re still figuring it out
I wasn’t going to get in the way of your development
I wanted you — oh definitely
but only in completion’s certainty
Anything shy of that
Wasn’t going to work
So I could wait.

After the partial embrace in front of others
You left the place with an interesting vibe
and your head down in a sulky manner
like we had unfinished business
it was almost as if you said to yourself
“damn” while walking away
like you missed some opportunity
when it was just “bad” timing
I stood there watching you go
with my hands in my pockets
and carried on when you closed the door
still thinking of you
and what just happened.

so just waiting for that moment
of which will probably never be
due to uncertainty’s hold on you
because beautiful woman
I’m so sure that I’m certainly certain’s sure
how I would not mind
to treat you as my lady
Not at all.

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