Current Mood:      Peaceful Certainty & Sad & Peaceful Certainty & Sad

Damn I can’t believe it’s over
I’m relieved but a little sad
It took me nearly 11 years
But I’ve let it go
what can be no more
about eleven years
in the dark of hidden love
caused by myself
but it was revealed
i suppose
for the reason to let go
i dunno
it now surfacing
of something not known to be there
not really
not consciously
after all of this time
is puzzling
wow
but it’s over
shrugs shoulders
it’s over

shaking head from side to side
it’s over
i chuckle
with sadness
it’s over

i still can’t believe it
with my mind
but i feel it
inside
it’s just one of those things

it’s gone
it’s left
for good
a hope that should have died
many many years ago
why now
it chose to rest in peace
i’ll never know
nor understand
its timing
why it hid
deep down within me
and from me
why it had me living
like it was no longer existent
i could have dealt with it then
instead of NOW
why the hell now

when i thought it was gone already
i’m stunned
feel empty
sadness begins to overtake me
but relieved
nonetheless.
why now?
i guess it doesn’t really matter
when
just that it happened
now.

it would have been nice
it would have
it just …
would.

hope
never fails to deny me
and yet it succeeds
in that.

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