Current Mood:      Angry & Angry

right now
I’m in a state of painful sadness
and i’m not depressed
i know the damn difference!
Do you?!

and well I’m sick of being sad
so have turned my sadness into anger
yea that’s right
i’m pissed!
but don’t get it twisted
in my anger i still make sense
a whole heap of it too
you’re gonna be like DAMN
because a lot of people in their anger
just mumble garbage
but not me
and yea you will see for yourself

it will come out harsh
and darn near rude
like a rude awakening
i might even hurt your feelings
because somewhere in it you’ll think i’m talking about you
so you’ll take the shit personal
and if you do
then that should tell you something about you
now shouldn’t it?!
but so what
if you want to avoid my anger
and keep from getting offended by something i say
then make damn sure you stay the fuck off my bad side
or better yet just don’t read the anger section of my blog.

like i posted somewhere on here
(no. i’m not going to look for it either. it’s on here!)
i’m just as mean as I am nice
and i’m extremely nice
so where does that leave my anger?
you put two and two together yet
yea you guessed it
a spot you don’t want to be
i’m not the violent type
but shit that doesn’t mean
i don’t have violent thoughts
and that’s real!

I wasn’t raised in some ghetto
I had the high life compared to most
my parents made sure of that
but i’ve come to learn
that i’ve got my father’s anger
an anger that roots not in the high life he gave us to live
enough said
so my anger is learned to be
from yea my dade-o, papa-san, my pops
anybody who’s ever seen him or heard him pissed
or felt a beat of his fist
well it’s a part of me - his anger
it just IS DAMMIT!
that i won’t deny now that i know
i’ve got violent thoughts
but you won’t see me physically attacking people
that’s not me, however, words I speak do wonders all by themselves
and I’m not talking about name-calling
there is a difference between that
and telling a person about themselves
the Truth has its way of penetrating where no fist can go
enough said.

i’m NOT angry often
as a matter of fact
it’s RARE
anyone who knows me can tell you that
but when i get there
i’m there
and you’ll know it
hear it
feel it
so much so you’ll see it
as if I’m right there in your face
with you looking dead at me
angry.

it’s a spot where oddly enough
i’m more open to see more into people
than they care for me to know/see
that’s right my third-eye, intuitive senses, psychic senses
whatever the fuck you want to call it
it’s all the same goddamn thing DAMN!
It tends to open wide become more alert
my awareness becomes heightened when I’m angry
and don’t ask me why because I haven’t taken the time to find out why
because SO FUCKIN’ WHAT!
IT IS WHAT IT IS
so don’t want me to know your business
and what you’re really like “deep” down inside
then again
stay the fuck off my bad side

i’m not pumping up my anger
just preparing you ahead of time
because if you choose to comment
you better KNOW my response won’t be pretty

when i get real angry
i tend to use profanity a lot
you’ll see the main ones i use
the bitch one — i don’t use ever
mf, damn, shit, fuck
and anything stemming off of it
yea you’ll read those

and i’ve been so fucking sad for the passed months
crying every goddamn night
and wee hours in the early morning
(and that’s NOT an exaggeration)
that I’m SO FED UP WITH THE SHIT!
SO YEA
I’VE DELIBERATELY CHOSEN
TO CONVERT ALL THAT FUCKIN’ SADNESS
into something that feels a hell of a lot better than
feeling the pain of sadness:
the runner up is
—————> ANGER
climbing my way up the emotional ladder
since i’m having some stupid ass difficulties
jumping straight to happiness again

And if you got a m’fuckin’ problem
with my anger
then get THE FUCK OFF MY BLOG!
Ya heard!

And if you want to say I have problems
well to that I say
YOU THINK?!
That’s obvious
especially when I’ve already stated it
my problem is sadness
problems of the heart
not anything to do with mankind

yea i know you think someone broke my heart
or someone did something to me
but in all honesty
the allowance of is my issue
This shit is between
ME and THE ALMIGHTY

You religious folk
mind your ears
mind your sight
cause what I’ve got to say
ain’t pretty!
But know the shit’s as real as it gets
you can act foolish if you want to
and blind yourself
but if you aren’t ready for the truth
then DAMMIT GET THE FUCK OFF MY BLOG NOW!
If it won’t make itself known to you here
I guarantee that it will make itself known to you somewhere
before you leave this corrupted planet!
I GUARANTEE IT!

stuff i’ll probably be posting til
my anger has lifted
and by lifted
i mean elevated off of me
so that it’s gone

and if I die in the process
should God strike me dead
then great
i’ve lived a great life while i was here anyway
so better now then later
And don’t say be careful what I say
I know EXACTLY what I’m doing
I’m not some fool
Like I said I’ve lived a great life while I was here anyway
Despite the rough patches
It’s been swell
So if God wants to zap my ass
killing me
then by all means I welcome it!
You see I’m as serious as the words I speak
As serious as death itself
So beam me up scottie!
And if you still think that I’m not
because you can’t wrap your mind around it
then that right there is letting you know
that you just have a problem with the Truth.
And in that case, GET THE FUCK OFF MY BLOG WITH THAT ISH!

Had people emailing me with their probs
and quite frankly
your shit has an easy solution
get the fuck in touch with yourself
and act.

Again this anger phase
is extremely rare in my life
It’s a side of me not even my best friends have seen
simply because there was never a need to show it
but they’ll see it if they come here

TEN TIMES AGAIN,
IF YOU DON’T ENJOY THE VIBE OF MY ANGER
THEN STEP OFF DAMMIT!

GO
SHOO
SAYONARA
ADIOS
BYE
C-YA

Well what are you waiting for…
GET OFF MY BLOG ALREADY!

And if you thought my other posts were me angry
well that’s a damn shame.
this is just the beginning
and yet my anger is usually short-lived
because i know how to handle it
a lot better than sadness
of which i don’t do.

That means, I like the way anger feels OVER THE PAIN OF SADNESS!
yea make sure you read the latter part of that
and don’t just take the first part alone
because to split it up would make for an inaccurate interpretation of what I said!
So get the shit right — KAPEESH!
If you don’t like seeing, reading, hearing
genuine honesty
then stop reading already.

I AM THE REAL DEAL!

Enough said!

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