How can that be?
One day
you’ll see
keep living
and start paying attention
a lot more
than you had before.

Fear of the Unknown
Not so fearful nor evil after all.

I had experienced the paranormal as a child before I practiced/lived religion
I had experienced it even in religion but they call it something else
the holy spirit, speaking in tongues, christ and so on
Nevertheless, it’s all the same
no matter their attempts
to convince me to believe otherwise
During the end part of my religious lifestyle
I started to practice that which is said to be evil
I said “What’s really the big idea?!”
I have practiced mind reading
I have practiced automatic hand writing
I have practiced OBE (out of body experience)
I have practiced my psychic abilities and all that comes with it;
third eye whatever you want to call it
I have experimented with brainwave technology
And honestly there’s not a single thing evil about it.
It depends on what you use it for
good or not so good things
but in itself is not evil at all.
My conclusion is what we all know as truth:
People fear the unknown
Because when you get to know and understand something
it’s really not so fearful nor evil after all.
Because everyone has it and everyone uses it
more times than not unconsciously
Psychic ability is a given to everyone at birth
It’s just part of our “spiritual genes”
You can call it what you want
but it’s really all the same thing.

Absolutely and Truthfully Speaking,
You cannot say your creator is “God” and say you aren’t “psychic”
You cannot say you hear from “God” and say you aren’t “psychic”
You cannot say you talk with “God” and say you aren’t “psychic”
Heck you cannot even reminisce about something and say you aren’t “psychic”
having accessed and easily executed a “psychic” ability (though unconsciously)
You can lie to yourself but it doesn’t erase the truth
as to say it would be contradictory and false since…
it is our connection to Self, Source, God, the spiritual world and this entire universe.
Some choose to shun it because of religious views or that of society
While others deliberately take the time to develop it further;
strengthening that lovely bond.

It’s a darn shame that religion looks upon it as being evil
to the point where they have made several attempts to turn something so precious given by God
into something distasteful and disgraceful
manipulating people into thinking that those who practice it are damned to some “hell”.
Fear of the unknown due to lack of understanding that causes one to be a hypocrite
Because religion too practices it on some level.

I feared it greatly when I started to practice it outside of religion
I feared I’d be going straight to “hell”.
After all, that’s what I was taught.
I kept on crawling back to Christianity a few times
But I had to know for myself
Is it TRUE what “they” say
Am I believing the absolute Truth
or am I believing things that aren’t true at all???
I felt a stronger urge to continue each time I returned to Christianity
until I returned no more
Christians would call it “That’s just the devil leading you in the wrong direction.”
And I just think to myself, “Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight; that’s a cop-out.”
And in the course of my journey for TRUTH
I had been called by a “few loving” christians things like
satan, devil, a demon, lost and everything associated with it
I even was told that I’d return to Christianity again; that this was just a phase.

[ I wasn't out to prove them wrong
psh - that's just wasted energy.
However after finding out what I now know
how could I possibly even consider going back?!
People filled with a lot of beliefs and no knowledge
easy prey to persuade to go back to something;
they're easy to manipulate because beliefs are just that
beliefs - nothing concrete about it
Beliefs are in essence another way of saying doubt.
Process that for a minute
compare it to its opposite.
Don't know its opposite?
I just told you. ]

Yea the name calling hurt a lot
because I started to wonder if I were satan or a demon
I was traveling a road I hadn’t been on
A road all by myself hanging on to God like there was no tomorrow
lil’ ol’ me started to believe what they were saying about me
but I couldn’t stop just because they disagreed with it,
I sure as heck was tempted to

but… but… but…

I HAD TO KNOW
regardless what the mass said
calling me names wasn’t going to stop me
when you HAVE to KNOW something
there isn’t a single thing that can stop you from KNOWING
God reveals things to those who desire KNOWLEDGE;
God doesn’t keep TRUTH from you
only you do
not a single person nor thing just YOU
The tree of life and knowlege of the good and evil - ring a bell?
Look at that very carefully and see it for what it is
and outside of religion I found …

[ I won't say more
your turn will come if not now
I will not have anything to do with influencing your experience
to each is unique
just as God would have it
up close and personal
much more than any religion could ever give
So when your turn comes
when you get that urge or pull
to face the KNOW and do away with mere beliefs
go with courage;
you'll be glad you did. ]

I don’t want to be like Christ, no offense, as Christianity sings about and teaches
Growing up, I had never wanted to be anyone other than just loving who I already am
nor had I ever been the gullible type
so it was odd for me to start singing that same tune
beginning at age 16 all the way to 24.
it was a lifestyle I deliberately chose to live
not a lifestyle that was forced upon me
I did feel “trapped” once I was inside
of course that feeling I buried
I was a non-denominational type of christian
all the many types is pure division
But talk about influence because I thought I had to say such
“wanting to be like Christ”
because my status was a Christian.
But I’ve always loved who I am
And loved just being me
and none other.
Religion wasn’t even satisfying to me
But I did learn a lot so I’m grateful for my experience
because in everything there’s a lesson to be learned.
I enjoyed it but something was missing that Christianity could not fulfill -
the answers to my questions that they passed off as just saying “That’s the devil just trying to kill you because the enemy is out to …” (you know the rest)

That’s not an answer to my questions
It’s just another way of them saying “I don’t know.”

I was just afraid to admit it being unfulfilled
being that I was so into that lifestyle
Because I thought “How can I feel this way when I’m a Christian,
been saved, baptized, filled with the holy spirit and speaking in tongues?
How could I possibly not be fulfilled
when I really truly love God
and not just saying it but really meaning it
having a good time overall in that way of living and being…
how could I NOT be satisfied a large percent of the time?”
It just didn’t make much of any sense.

So I continued my lifestyle as a Christian after burying that deep within
brought more people to church to be “saved” and so on;
carried my bible everywhere I went.
I started to take on a new reputation in school
as the girl who carried her bible
I’d pray for people, bought bibles to give to people.
I was the “perfect” little christian girl
molded by the churches
leaders and teachings of several popular
and not so popular bishops, pastors, ministers etc.
all believed to be lead by God
And I’m quite sure some of them heard from an outside “source”
beyond this world via “channeling”
And yet something was STILL missing

[ What I learned and experienced does not go in vein
when it's helped mold me to who I am today. ]

A real relationship with the power and satisfaction of knowing
that was the missing piece
Believing was just not enough
it produced no evidence in itself
Little did I know my journey for Truth
would actually graduate me to another level
OUTSIDE of and away from religion.

Well I just am to be ME
and that’s who I intend to be
it’s who I was before Christ and who I’ll be after Christ: I AM
I love me and pleased to be who I AM.
not a “wannabe” something I’m not
not a “trynabe” either
I’m ME at best
And if this “Christ” and I just happen to share some of the same traits, then fine
but at least I am the AM in I
Which makes me and keeps me
completely unique and free
as my Creator created me to be.

I AM the AM in I. <– click here.

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